Spanners vs. Cobras

The Spanners were 17-12 up by halftime. The End. Well not quite; the Cobras did run through three unanswered tries in the second half. But bear in mind that the Spanners finished 16th during the 2007 season, while the Cobras placed 2nd. Now although we have come a long way this season, a win against the Cobras would amount to an enormous transformation; comparable to Danny Bonaduce not being regarded as a douche, or Celine Dion topping the charts again.

If you look closely, half our back line played for the U19 6th team. After finishing our little games on a Saturday morning, we would make our way over to the Piley to watch our superiors play, i.e. the Cobras. If this wasn't bad enough, I would then be hounded by an injured Justin Bijl ordering me to do a tuckshop run for him. My voice fluttered as I tried to explain that I was in fact not a newboy, but also in matric. Do you want me to tick your name off the rolecall, newboy? Yes, Mr Bijl. Sorry Sir.

My childhood was not filled with rugby clinics, or any recreational activity for that matter. My father would never have a quick game of passing the rugby ball. In fact he never acknowledged my presence at all. Another element is the fact that I have never worn a baseball cap or collared shirt to gym. These all form the collective damming factor in my rugby career. Notice the lack of words such as "skill" or "ability" in the certificate that was awarded to the Spanner's number 11.

Referee: An independent expert charged with enforcing the rules of the game. Unfortunately this was not the case on Wednesday night. Not to say that he was biased, just shit with the innate urge to yellow card anyone and everyone, even threatening yours truly. He had the stubborn qualities of say, Kenny Williams, but with the thought patterns of Aileen Wuornos after being deprived of her lithium. Now when I tried to gain a photo of KJW off the Internet, I got absolutely nothing. So I took the liberty of creating Kenny's very own Wikipedia article: check it out. [Update: It is with regret that I inform you to the fact that Wikipedia deleted Kenny Williams from their website citing that "Real person; doesn't indicate importance/significance". Fortunately, I calcified the article so you can view the original by clicking here.]

I hope you appreciate that photo, because it took ages to locate, eventually turning up in the June 2004 magazine. If I were trying to find a photo of say, Patrick Kint, well that would be simple as his mug shot is in nearly every fucking magazine post 2005. I want my laptop back. Anyways, the point is that the ref was shit and stole some of the enjoyment from what was a gees-filled match.

I feel that bleeding during a rugby match is tangible evidence of gees. In my glory days, I would more often than not be spilling blood like a cocaine snorting hemophiliac on the 30th day. That photo is of my hand after the match against the Panthers. More recently, our try scorer on Wednesday night left the field not only bleeding, but also with a broken nose due to a wayward elbow. Some good ol' fashioned rugby.

Unfortunately, we were denied a bonus point which would have come in handy in the coming weeks as both the loosing teams from group B (Panthers & Barbarians) managed to claim 1 point for their efforts. Next week will see us running on the field against the Nadoes. Predominantly a Bosch oldboys team, they took first place in last years competition. So come support your local tools on Wednesday 21st May at 19:30 on field B.

Apologies for the underlying Bishops theme, but we did play the Cobras after all. How was that 75th minute try by the Stormers? Fuck I love rugby. Soccer on the otherhand...